Slow Learner

22Jan10

Ok, before y’all roll your eyes and snark, “Slow LEARNER?!?! How about slow BLOGGER!” Yes. I am. I’ve been out of ideas, out of inspiration, out of focus. All that. Back in the day I might have said at this point, “I’m back!” But honestly, I don’t know. All I know is that for the first time in what seems like forever I’ve been having that “I’ve got to blog that” feeling.

Here’s the thing. I made a parenting breakthrough.

Sit down. I can’t help you. If you have one small brain cell in your body you already made this breakthrough. In fact, it probably wasn’t even a breakthrough for you. It probably came along as easily as, say, breathing. Ok, so with that…here it is.

Stop trying to get shit done!

Duh.  I was finding that I was getting really impatient with my kids. They always wanted to be picked up, they always wanted my attention, blah blah blah…any toddler mom gets this. I had chalked it all up to a phase and had really latched on to this new theory that 18 months is the new Terrible Two.

I’ve realized that when we’re out, I’m so kid-focused.  We go to parks or on nature walks where we frolic together and spend hours look at sticks.  We go on errands where I talk to them constantly without any legitimate response as if I’m some kind of deranged person.  We go to playdates where I drink champagne and complain to my fellow moms…oh wait.  That’s not a good example.  Anyway – most trips out of the  house?  Supermom!

At home?  Eh.  I’m always trying to accomplish stuff which pisses off the kids and then they come to get me and then they’re all whiny and then I’m annoyed and it’s a nasty circle.  Nothing gets done, kids are pissed, I’m stressed and my house looks like shit!  Not to mention the fact that my blog never gets updated.  (They seem to REALLY hate it when I’m on the laptop.)

I don’t know when the realization hit me.  Sit with them.  Play.  Have tea parties.  ALL GODDAMN DAY.  But it’s really not like that.  When I’m in the mindset of doing other things, playing with them seems like a nuisance.  I think, “Play with each other!  With the Fisher Price showroom I’ve bought you!  With the dog!”  But in these past couple days playing with them has been fun.  We giggle.  We pretend.  We chase each other.  I pick them up because I want to.  It’s so much fun. And the days fly by.  Ok – full disclosure –  they go by.  No dragging, though!

I don’t mean to portray myself as Mommie Dearest.  Even before all this, I played with them a lot.  It was just that I also had the nerve to do my own thing on occasion.  20 month old kids are NOT having that.  No ma’am.

The funny part is that surprisingly enough  (or not at all, if you’re one of those lucky folk I mentioned above who has a brain) my house looks pretty much the same.    Whether or not I spend my days trying to get shit done or trying to build the bestest MegaBlok tower,  it’s a pit.  I’ll clean up when they go to college.

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5 Responses to “Slow Learner”

  1. Once again, you could be me, just at a different laptop being boarded by baby pirates. I once read the quote “trying to clean the house while the kids are still growing is like shoveling the walk while it’s still snowing.” Yup, my house looks like crap all the time. I just haven’t been able to let go and realize that it’s the same whether I try or not. I think maybe I’ll try that for awhile. Thanks!

  2. 2 Superstar

    Case in point. I had the sheer audacity to mop my floors this morning. There’ve been a few times in the last couple days where I’ve had to rescue a child who got stuck in whatever sticky goo they created in the floor. I figured I should probably mop. After Lefty wiped out a few times on the wet wood floors and Righty got mighty chuckles out of it, they decided to destroy the living room instead. Guaranteed that as soon as the floor was dry, they continued their destruction in the freshly cleaned kitchen and dining room. The place looks exactly like it did before I mopped, minus the sticky goo.

  3. Amen! This completely resonates with me. When I’m trying to be in my “get-shit-done” mode, it’s no fun at all. (Actually if I can get the kids out of the house, it’s awesome to multitask the laundry, vacuuming, pick up etc. Exhilarating. But that’s not the point.) During the week, as a sahm, it’s better to realize that if you cant beat them, join them! We should join forces – your pit or mine?

  4. It’s so true. There is only one thing the kiddos let me do while theyre around: vacuum. And it’s only because they’re currently obsessed with it. Everything else just has to wait. Until when, I’m still not sure…

  5. 5 ms planner

    Such a great post. I hope your having some fabulous tea parties!


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